3 hours ago
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
The Measure of a Man
I haven't been in much of a blogging or a blog hopping mood this past week so I thought it was time that I share why.
As I have mentioned briefly a few times in past posts my hubby has been battling various health issues. The biggie battles are with severe depression and anxiety. My strong, energetic, happy, hard working hubby has a chemical imbalance that requires that he always take something to keep balanced. The problem he ran into was that after 7 years, the medication was giving him severe headaches/migraines that were too much for him to handle. He also developed TMJ due to the side effect of clinching his teeth during his sleep from the medications. The TMJ is also severe and causes intense jaw pain on a daily basis. There is also an issue with his hearing/sound (TMJ related) and ulcers from the overwhelming stress. ALL of these things are intertwined and effect each other for the worse. My hubby tried to work these things out with the help of his doctors and counselors but, things were not improving so currently my hubby, the awesome man that he is, is seeking further support for the depression and anxiety with a treatment program. This is a VERY slow recovery and a VERY hard recovery for him and quite frankly for me. My hubby is am amazing guy and anyone who has met him knows that he is FULL of life and passion and that nothing slows him down. This has been going on for about a year and a half but, has been the hardest over the past 8 months or so.
I have never before felt called to a cause but, now more than ever I feel an overpowering desire to speak out about mental health. There are so many misconceptions about mental health but, there is also such a great need for better treatment and care for people battling their minds. I personally know so many people who live depressed on a daily basis and either don't recognize it or are afraid to admit it and get the help they need and deserve to live their life to the fullest. If any of you know someone or are personally battling depression/anxiety, etc. please know that you are not alone! Get counseling and if needed, find a temporary or permanent mediation that will bring you more balance with the help of a specialist.
I struggled with horrible depression the first 4 months of my pregnancy. I have experienced first hand how hormones can impair a person's ability to find joy. I have never had issues with depression before and I tried EVERYTHING to encourage myself to not feel the way I did and nothing helped. I remember the battle inside myself was so intense. I kept telling myself that I was stronger than the cloud hanging over me and that I could beat it but, I just couldn't. I didn't even want to share with anyone that we were pregnant because I wasn't excited about it at all... and for the record this was a VERYY wanted pregnancy so there was NO reason for me to not want to share other than I felt AWFUL. I remember to the day exactly when the cloud lifted. I woke up one morning and just felt VERY different. I immediately recognized that I felt lighter, and even happy. I hesitated to get too excited about the new feeling because I thought it might be temporary. I remember showering and expecting the cloud to come over me again at any second but, it never came back!! All this to say that I get it. I get that it is a chemical thing and that people can't just "choose to be happy," or use the "mind over matter," techniques in that state. It's more than just a bad day, week or even years.
My husband is an incredible man of God. Not a day goes by that he doesn't tell me how much he loves me or appreciates me during this challenging season. He is doing everything in his power to get himself well again and to me that is THE MEASURE OF A MAN. A man who has the strength even in weakness to do what is best for himself and his family. A man who is humble enough to admit that he needs help and yet strong enough to not let it dent his honor. A man man who leans on the Lord when he is weak and leans on those he loves instead of pushing them away in his pain. A man who doesn't try to fix it or do it all on his own when he knows he can't. A man who doesn't cast blame on others and instead excepts responsibility for his own actions. A man who is willing to share his struggles even in the face of them, with others in hope that he can help and encourage through his experiences. This truly is the measure of a man. I don't know when this "cloud"along with the other health issues are going to be a thing of the past but, I know if anyone can get through it, my husband can. We welcome your prayers and support!
We have had an outpouring of support from family, friends, our church and our neighbors. I am humbled by the love we have been shown during this season. Thank you a million times over to everyone who has reached out to us in some way or another and to everyone who is taking the extra time to stick with Joey (and me) during this long road to recovery.
I asked my hubby if he minded if I shared this and being the awesome guy that he is he gave me the green light to share because he trusts me. I'm a lucky gal to be able to blog about something so personal! One thing I know all to well is that secrets consume a person, a family and a marriage. We want to let it all hang out so to speak so that God can be given all the glory when Joey is well again. We want to be as real as we can with everyone so that we don't have to wear a mask. It is so tiring to wear a mask and if any of you are carrying one I hope you can learn to take it off and let out whatever you are holding on to. Though some will pull things out of context, we hope that this message will be well received and understood in Jesus name. If you have questions feel free to send me an e-mail. I am happy to answer any and all....don't speculate, just ask. Thanks so much friends!
We are about to celebrate 7 years of marriage on May 1st and we have been together for over 11 years now. Thanks to the Lord's constant efforts to refine us, we have a pretty solid foundation built on the rock. This season is very hard but, it is only making us stronger all praise to Jesus for that! These pictures were taken last year on our 6 year anniversary and I shared some last year but, wanted to share a few again today. I did just have a baby and it was 95 degrees out with sweltering humidity so forgive us for looking uh, moist! lol.
I love my guy to pieces! He is so handsome, funny, helpful, hard working, an awesome Daddy and my very best friend. Get well hubby so we can get back to exploring the wonders of the world together!! All my love.
"Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God." Psalm 20:7
"For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13
"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things." Philippians 4:8
"The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8
"For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."
2 Timothy 1:7